Dear Prince Andrew,

It has come to our attention that you are seeking some greenery in order to cooperate with the FBI.

Specifically, you asked for an olive branch to assist the Jeffrey Epstein investigation.

So here you go, you own personal olive branches. We hope these are sufficient.

Now pick up the phone & call your lawyers.

Regards, Lisa & Jen, commoners.

Just in: The Toronto Sun had this from a former law officer: “Andrew is apparently unaware that his royal privilege only goes so far in America. He has only offered to give a written statement with a limited amount of questions and a narrow scope.

“A written statement, which is what Prince Andrew seems to be offering, would not be sufficient. He wants to be able to say publicly he is co-operating without giving the federal authorities what they want,” former prosecutor Renato Mariotti told the Mail.